How a cappucino craving made me $300

I pulled into the parking garage and looked at the clock.

9:34 am.

"Man... it's too early," I said to myself.

Parking was a breeze on this morning... the digital sign outside the garage entrance said there were 524 available parking spots on the first floor.

I guess even the degenerates take Sunday mornings off.

I squinted from the bright sun as I made my way to the main entrance. When I got to the door, it opened for me on cue and I was immediately hit by the overwhelming stench of stale cigarette smoke.

See, in Vegas, they attempt to cover up the smell of smoke with scented cleaners and disinfectants.

Not in Temecula.

Normally, when I make the long walk from the garage to the poker room, I keep my eyes on the ground in front of me, pumping Metallica loudly from my iPod and try to ignore the sad sight of people gambling money they cannot afford to lose.

But today would be different.

As I stepped into the dimly lit casino, I took a look around. First, to my left I saw an old Hispanic couple sitting side-by-side at a couple of quarter slot machines. They looked like they had been there all night. The old man was wearing a t-shirt that looked like it should have been destroyed fifteen years ago, and the old woman had a cigarette dangling from her lip that almost fell out of her mouth on numerous occasions as she drifted in and out of consciousness.

To my right, people were seated at the bar sipping on alcoholic beverages... at 9:30 in the morning.

I walked past scores of people that were heading to the exit. Most looked depressed... and some, downright upset. These were not people that had just lost a $40 pot when their pocket aces were cracked... these were people that had fed their last dollar into a slot machine in hopes of "getting lucky" and were going home broke. Again. And payday is 12 days away.

The reason I was here... in a casino at 9:30 am on a Sunday... was because I woke up craving a cappuccino.

And those world famous Pechanga cappuccinos are good. Damn good.

When I got up to the poker room, I headed to the registration line for the tournament. I was standing behind a middle-aged guy already wearing his wrap-around sunglasses and two women. I knew that these would be my table-mates and I smiled.

When I got to my seat, I scanned the table. I am not exaggerating when I say that it was by far the weakest group of poker players I have ever had the privilege of playing with.

They were all horrible.

Every one of them.

I put my ear buds in, selected my Lagwagon tunes and sat down. I had a good feeling about today.

Before I was even dealt my first hand, the food service lady walked by and placed my order for that cappuccino.

For the first 4 orbits, I couldn't pick up a hand to save my life. I watched as the two ladies at the table would call raises and re-raises with baby pocket pairs and have the other donkeys bluff all their chips off to them. At one point, in the second orbit with blinds at 50/100 (starting stacks of 2500), one lady had over 12,000 in chips already.

I licked my lips and kept telling myself to play patient.

In the fourth orbit, with blinds at 50/100, I picked up K-10 on the button with one limper ahead of me. I called, as did both blinds and we saw the flop 4 handed.

A-10-5 rainbow.

It's checked around, and I fire out a small bet for about 1/3rd of the pot. The small blind calls and every body else folds.

The turn is another 5. I check and the small blind bets the pot. I fold and I'm down to under 2,000.

An orbit later, back on the button with blinds at 100/200, I pick up A-K. This time there is 3 limpers and I push for my remaining 1800. It's folded around to one of the ladies who, after asking for assistance with the math, puts out the call. She tables Q-J and we're off to the flop.

I flop my king and scoop the pot. After that hand, I had 4300 chips.

A couple hands later in mid position, I pick up 8-8 and make a standard raise to 600. Everybody folds and I take the blinds.

Right before the first break, I'm in the big blind with A-4. Two limpers and the small blind calls, and off to the flop we go.

Flop comes down 3-6-7 all spades. I quickly check back at my cards and discover I am holding the ace of spades. I fire out a bet of about half the pot and announce that I "can't afford to have somebody suck out on me." I get one caller... the lady that doubled me up earlier.

The turn brings a red 10. I look over to her and check. She reaches for her chips.

I say, "Ohhhhh no you don't want to bet here..." and I flash her the Ace of spades. She bets anyway for 1,000 leaving only 1,500 behind. There's over 6,000 in the pot and I've got the nut flush draw, a gutshot straight draw and an overcard.

I call.

The river is the King of spades. I tell her sorry and push all-in.

Now, I wasn't kidding about how bad these players were. I had already exposed the ace of spades on a board with 3 spades, the river brings the 4th spade, the board isn't paired, and I move all-in.

And she calls.

With Q-10! NO SPADE!

I take the pot down and now I'm sitting comfortably with over 10,000 in chips.

After the break, I go card-dead again. Every time it's my big blind, some schmuck raises like 6 and 8 times the big blind and I have to fold.

The announcement is made that the tournament drew almost 300 players and they would be paying out the top 2 tables (20 players).

I look around the room and count about 8 tables left. With the terrible blinds schedule, I knew we'd be down to 2 tables within 90 minutes.

Time goes by, and I watch as the donkeys at my table proceed to put all their chips in the middle with hands like 33 preflop and bottom pair on the river.

My chip stack eventually dwindles down to under 4,000 and the table breaks. I'm moved to a new table with new donkeys and have only 4 times the big blind. I know I'm going to have to get lucky and double up a couple times quickly to stand any chance of cashing.

With one limper ahead of me, I look down at K-9 in the cutoff and quickly push all my chips in. It's folded back to the limper and he calls. He shows A-8.

The flop brings my King, and I avoid the Ace, and double up.

30 minutes pass, and we're down 5 tables when I get dealt K-5 in my big blind, facing a pre-flop raise for all my chips.

I'm still severely short stacked and decide to call, hoping for two live cards. When I call, he tables K-9 and I'm dominated.

The flop comes A-2-4 and I pick up additional outs.

I start calling out loud for a 3 or a 5.

The turn brings a 10.

The river brings another 2.

Damn. I shake hands with the guy next to me and head for the door. It's then that I hear,

"Chop chop!"

I turn around and jog back to the table. Holy shit. His 9 doesn't play and we chop.

The very next hand I get dealt A-J in the small blind and face a raise and a call. I push for my remaining chips and both call.

The original raiser shows A-10 and the caller shows K-10.

Wow. I'm ahead.

The flop brings my Jack... but also 2 clubs.

I have no clubs.

I scan the other cards and the K-10 guy is suited... with clubs.

So now I have to dodge a King and any club with two cards to come.

The turn is a low red card, and the river is a low spade.

Whew. My hand holds and I'm up to over 30,000 just like that.

When we're down to 22 players, we begin hand-for-hand play. Blinds are 2,000/4,000 and I start picking on the shorter stacks. I pick up a couple of blinds uncontested and we're down to 21.

Blinds increase to 3,000/6,000 and I pick up K-J spades under the gun. I decide to limp here, hoping a short stack will make a move and I can call. Instead, a medium stack player in seat one pushes for another 15,000. It's folded around to me and I call.

He tables A-Q off-suit.

I have two live cards and I'm suited. I like my chances.

The flop is a dream flop: K-K-10 with two clubs giving me 3 Kings and leaving him drawing very thin. If the Jack comes to give him his straight, I fill up. He's dead to running Aces, Queens, or clubs.

The turn brings a 5 of clubs. The turn is a 4 of clubs and he scoops the pot with the flush. I'm devastated, as I lose half my chips with 21 players remaining.

We go on break, and I call Stewman to half-brag and half-bitch about the last hand. Without giving me any advice, he offers some words of encouragement and I hang up.

When we come back, the other players at the table are talking about a guy at another table who only has two chips left and he's in the small blind. He gets knocked out on the first hand back from the break, and I'm in the money.

When we re-draw seating assignments, everybody starts talking about a chop. A 20-way chop would give everybody $270. Since everybody is about even in chips, there really isn't any vocal opposition. We take a vote and 1 kid doesn't want to chop. He has more chips than the average guy, but he's well short of the big stack.

He explains that there's 2 extremely short stacks on the other table and he doesn't want to agree to a chop until those guys are gone. It's agreed and we play on.

Blinds are now at 5,000/10,000 and I have 25,000 in chips.

I fold the first couple of hands, and when I get to UTG I look down at K-Q offsuit. I ask for time and look around the table. At this point, I don't think anybody will want to race with a small pair, so I push all my chips in. It's folded around to the big blind and he asks for a count. It's only 15,000 more to him and I get worried.

"You don't HAVE to call, ya know," I say.

He explains that he just can't see laying his hand down for only 15,000 more. It's then that I expose my two hole cards (on purpose of course) but pretend that I thought he said he was going to fold. I figure if he has an ace or any pair, he's calling no matter what, but if I can get him to lay down his weak King or Queen, I win 15,000 chips without a call.

I apologize to the table, stammering on about how I thought he folded, yadda yadda.

He calls.

He tables KQ.

We chop it up, and I live to fight another day.

A couple hands later, the small stacks are both knocked out, we take another vote and this time, all 18 remaining players agree to an even chop. We each get $300 which is just short of 5th place prize money.

Overall, I'm happy with my play. I managed to avoid getting unlucky for the majority of the tournament, and when the guy did suck-out, I had enough chips to weather the storm.

If I win that hand, I have almost 80,000 in chips going into the final table and there's no way I agree to an even chop. Oh well.